Birthday Fun
by CarlileLovesAnime
Summary: Quick fics for each character on their birthday. For BrytheWolf's challenge on deviantART.
1. Oct 8 Bianchi

**This would be the first in a series of fics based off of BrytheWolf's Birthday Fun challenge on deviantART. Since today is October eighth, I'm going to post my first of these fics for Bianchi. **

**The next will be posted on October 10****th**** for Xanxus.**

**I do not own KHR or anything related to it. **

0o.o0o.o0

It was Bianchi's fifth birthday, and she was happier than she could have been on any other birthday. It wasn't because her parents had finally gotten her that pink bike she wanted, or because her cake was her favorite (strawberry) flavor, or even because she was going to have all her best friends over for an awesome party later.

It was because she had now found her favorite way to bother her four-month-old baby brother, Hayato.

She stood in front of baby Hayato's cradle, hunched over to see his face, and smiled mischievously at him before crossing her eyes. At once, the infant whined like a kicked dog.

She uncrossed her eyes and stared at him intently, evilly, to which he reacted by silencing himself.

She chuckled to herself. This kid was sure fun to mess with! Bianchi rolled both her eyes toward the center of her face again, earning another high-pitched wince from Hayato. She kept it like this for a little longer and almost started him on a full-out cry.

When she got back into a regular expression, she felt a little dizzy. She made a twisted face, and Hayato giggled at it, taking him out of the close-to-crying fit.

And then _he_ crossed his own eyes.

Bianchi and baby Hayato both laughed. He looked so silly! Especially when one of his eyes slowly rolled back into forward focus and the other did not.

Then she went cross-eyed, and he went back to normal, and he laughed at her.

And all Bianchi could think was, "Damn, now I need to figure out another way to bother him."


	2. Oct 10 Xanxus

**Here's the second installment of the Birthday Fun series (: It's October 10****th**** – Xanxus' birthday. (This one should be a little more crackish than the last.)**

**BTW, I know Gokudera would actually be **_**one**_** month old during Bianchi's fifth birthday, not **_**four**_** months old. I made him older so the story would be a little more accurate. After all, one-month-olds don't laugh, really. **

**The next post will be for Reborn's birthday on October 13****th****. **

**I don't own KHR! **

0o.o0o.o0

"All right, guys. You ready?"

"Ready as I'll ever be."

"We need to _not_ screw this up."

Four men stood huddled close and spoke in hushed, hoarse tones outside Xanxus' bedroom door. One wore a pink tuxedo, another wore a colorful silk kimono and the other two the regular old Varia uniforms.

They broke away and three of them stepped cautiously backward while the green-haired one concentrated hard on the door for a minute, then in one swift move roundhouse kicked it down.

Xanxus shot up out of bed. "What the—"

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BOSS!" the four _grown men_ sang out as they burst in through the doorway.

For a moment, Xanxus stared wide-eyed at his subordinates and they all beamed back at him idiotically.

"Oh, wait, the cake!" Lussuria flounced out of the room and came back with a gourmet dessert on a platter. It was a triple-tiered vanilla cake with the bottom and top sections smothered in thick dark chocolate frosting and the middle covered with vanilla frosting and chocolate icing laced around it in a zebra-stripe-like fashion. Pink frosting roses and candied strawberries strategically encircled the cake on the plate, and a big candle with the number th—er, well, I'll let you _guess _his age—sat on the top. (**A/N:** Oh, man, my stomach just gurgled…)

"Yaaaaaaayy~!" Belphegor cheered and reached for the cake.

Levi-A-Than slapped the blonde's hand away. "No, Bel! It's for the Boss."

Lussuria (who was wearing the kimono) shoved the huge cake in Xanxus' face. "Well, what are you waiting for? Blow out the candles, Xanxus-chan!"

Xanxus glanced unamused back and forth at the cake and the flaming gay man holding the cake in front of him. Then the Varia boss coughed and the candles went out.

"Hooray!" the four overly-enthusiastic men yelled. Squalo threw forth a cloud of confetti and Belphegor pulled a noisemaker out of God-knows-where and blew on it. Levi jumped up and down like a giddy schoolgirl.

Lussuria grinned creepily. "So, did you make your wish?"

Xanxus narrowed his eyes and sighed angrily. "Yes," he said. "My wish was for you all to _**GET THE F*CK OUT OF MY ROOM!**_"

Levi gained a sad look and tried to slowly sneak out, but Belphegor grabbed his shirt sleeve, as if to say, 'Like hell you are.'

Squalo shrugged. "Aw, you told us what it was, so it's not coming true."

Xanxus furrowed his eyebrows, clenched his fists and teeth and frowned, and the four could now literally see fire in Xanxus' eyes and steam shooting out of his ears. He started growling like a hungry wolf.

Gone. They were _gone_, cartoonish smoke and running sounds following.

Mammon turned off the video camera and slowly, silently, stealthily snuck away, Xanxus staring her down the entire time until she completely exited the room, setting the door back on its hinges and then shutting it gently behind her.

After some cooling down, Xanxus face-palmed and sighed. "Why must I work with such _idiots_?" he asked. Then he looked down to see the hurriedly dropped cake splattered all over his bed and the floor. He dipped his finger in some of the wasted frosting and licked it off and shrugged.

"They do make a decent cake, though."

Meanwhile, Belphegor (who wore the pink tux, ha), Levi-A-Than, Squalo, Lussuria and Mammon congregated in the kitchen. Lussuria just realized that he had ruined that birthday cake he worked so hard on; Levi felt terrible for treating his boss in such an unpleasant way; Mammon was upset that she wasn't able to capture what she wanted on video and therefore people wouldn't pay full price to see Xanxus' birthday surprise; Squalo contemplated any and all the ways Xanxus would torture him for this later; only Belphegor expressed his thoughts aloud.

"That," the blonde boy said, "Was the best. birthday. EVER!"

And they all agreed.

0o.o0o.o0

**God, I suck at crack. TT_TT**


	3. Oct 13 Reborn

**Hola, people! This is the third installment of the Birthday Fun challenge: October 13 – Reborn's birthday. **

**I took the PSAT today so I'm very tired and my brain is fried so please forgive the suckishness of my writing as my mind is on vacation in the Bahamas right now. **

**I do not own KHR. **

0o.o0o.o0

The very day Reborn left, Luce wrote the words "_REBORN_ _BACK_" and circled them with red Sharpie on October 13th on her calendar. Then came the waiting game. August 30, September 5, September 22, October 12, still waiting.

She had started getting antsy shortly after he left as she began to feel sick. She felt queasy at the ingestion, taste or even smell of many foods, had cravings for weird things and puked her guts out pretty much every morning. Upon being asked by Luce what was going on, Lal Mirch had replied gruffly, "How stupid can you be?"

And Verde confirmed everyone's suspicion with a checkup.

Luce's first thought upon hearing about her… _condition_ wasn't on whether or not she was really ready to have a kid (which she definitely was) or where she should shop for baby things. It was, "How am I going to break it to the father?"

0o.o0o.o0

Reborn had agreed to meeting Luce for dinner as soon as he got back on the thirteenth. She wanted to tell him in the best environment, so as not to make him freak out too bad. (Although later as she looked at the bill, she thought to herself, 'What was I thinking?') Even though she wasn't showing at all yet, Luce wanted to wear an empire-waisted dress. This seemed totally inconspicuous as far as she was concerned.

He was late, but not too badly. She had only been sitting alone for about five minutes. And he donned his trademark black suit, which she _loved_ seeing him in. He sat down and hurriedly unfolded the napkin and placed it on his lap; he didn't even say a word to her until he was fully settled in the chair.

"Hey." That's all he said.

Luce smiled at him with her super-special-awesome Sky Arcobaleno smile. "I missed you so much, Reborn," she said. "Did the trip go well?"

He nodded. The waiter came over and poured water into Reborn's glass. "Anything to drink tonight, signore, signora?"

"Your best merlot, please," Reborn said. (**A/N: **Merlot is a type of wine.)

Luce raised her eyebrows to look almost as if she were pleading with the man, even though he was a waiter and it was his job to do whatever the hell she asked. "I'm just fine with the water, thanks."

"Very well." The waiter walked away.

Reborn gave her a quizzical look. "You love a good red wine," he said. "If you're worried about driving, don't worry. I can take you back to the base. I'm going there, too, anyway; we can just come by here tomorrow morning and bring your car back."

She smiled. "I-it's not that," she said, her eyes wandering to the table corner in a guilty way. "It's—"

Reborn's cell phone went off. "Hold that thought," he said. He slid it out of his coat pocket, turned his head away from the table and answered it.

"Hello? …Oh, hey, Colonello… I don't know. I just got back… Yes, French food is good… I have before, actually… Well, they kind of lack substance, but they're good with salt… I've heard that's particularly tough… Where are you calling from, again? … Do you want me to pick you up? … Not right now. Later… I'm on a date with Luce… Whatever… Okay, yeah, bye." He clicked it off and directed his attention toward the woman again. "You were saying?"

She sighed. Reborn knew better than to answer trivial phone calls when he was on a freaking _date_… right? "Well, it's not that I'm worried about driving, it's—"

"Your wine, signore." The waiter stood beside the table and carefully poured the alcohol into Reborn's glass. Then he left it on the tabletop.

"Thank you," Reborn said as he picked up the wine glass and swirled the liquid around.

"You're welcome. May I take food orders?"

Luce put her hand up. "Ah, I'm actually not that hungry." She bit her lip. Luce was really thinking, _can he just shut up and leave already? _She handed him the menu as if it were boiling hot.

"Lobster bisque, please," Reborn requested. He gave the woman a weird look before handing the waiter his menu, and she shot one right back at him.

"All right, I'll get it right to you." The (nuisance) waiter left briskly after writing the order down _very-very-oh-so-painfully-please-God-would-you-hurry-up _slowly.

Her inborn nature to be kindly was the one thing keeping her from glaring evilly at Reborn. Interrupted again. If this went on for much longer, she felt like she would get ready to explode. She opened her mouth to speak, but Reborn lifted his wine glass up at the same time.

"Cheers," he said.

Luce felt like rolling her eyes and groaning and perhaps even shooting lasers out of her eyes at him as she picked up her glass of water. "To life," she said.

"Because whether it's created, lived out or destroyed" – he clinked her glass – "in the end, it's pretty sweet." And they both drank.

She only managed to down a couple sips before almost choking it all right back out. _Drink slower_, she reminded herself. She set the glass down.

And in one swift, _deliberate_, jack-ass move, Reborn set his wine glass down at an angle. Red wine splattered out onto his perfect black tuxedo jacket. He looked down at the spill in very well acted-out surprise, shined a brief nervous smile at Luce and said, "Oh, damn, I'll have to go wash that out. Excuse me." He stood up.

She grabbed his sleeve. _Oh, no he's not_. "Um, wait, Reborn, there's something I really need to talk to you about."

"I'm sure it's important, but I need to get to the bathroom to wash this out."

"This is really serious. It can't wait _any more_."

"I'll only be a minute, really."

"REBORN, I HAVE BEEN TRYING TO TELL YOU THIS FOR SEVERAL MINUTES NOW BUT I KEEP GETTING INTERRUPTED, AND IF YOU GO WASH THAT _RED_ STAIN OUT OF YOUR _BLACK_ SHIRT RIGHT NOW, SO HELP ME GOD, I WILL F*CKING CASTRATE YOU!"

Silence immediately fell all throughout the dining room. Everyone stared at the couple. Reborn stared at Luce. _Did she just actually raise her voice? That was a first!_

She eyed him impatiently from below and he sighed and let his wrist go limp. She let go of his sleeve.

"Okay," he said, "What?"

She inhaled and exhaled very loudly. "I'm pregnant."

Cheers and claps and whistles instantly rose from the other restaurant patrons.

The two Arcobaleno kept staring at each other for the longest time, until, finally, Reborn winked one eye, and purred, "Oh really?"

Of course, Luce heard everything he meant behind that: _I've known for weeks so I'm acting like a jerk because I don't want you to make a fool of yourself, telling me what I already know, but it looks like you just did that anyway so I'll play along. _

She shook her head. "You son of a bitch…"

0o.o0o.o0

**I know it's terribly, **_**terribly **_**OOC but I don't care. **


	4. Oct 14 Tsuna

**October 14****th**** is today! Happy birthday, Tsuna!**

**The next chapter is for Chikusa, I believe, on the 26****th**** of October.**

**I do not own KHR.**

0o.o0o.o0

Tsuna really hated that he could never escape his job… even when he was _asleep_.

In fact, this time fate was especially mean to him, because he was having the most magnificent dream! He was drifting on a giant leaf with Kyoko cuddled up close to him, through a field of wildflowers five stories tall, the breeze gently carrying them between the tall stems. Butterflies and bees flitted about them. Joyous birdsongs surrounded them.

"Kyoko-chan…" Tsuna liked how his voice seemed to echo off of nothing.

She looked at him wide-eyed and hopeful. "Tsuna-kun…" she whispered.

And as they stared at each other lovingly, their faces drew closer and closer together, lips drew apart and eyes began to close—

"Even when we're fumbling while advancing, we're running fast over the days~"

_Stupid cell phone!_

The real Tsuna's eyes shot open as he was abruptly jolted out of his beautiful dream. He could see his tiny flip phone a mere foot away from his face, vibrating on his nightstand, the screen glowing in the night and oh God what time was it anyway?

He grimaced and groaned and drew his arm out from under the covers to grab the phone and flipped it open without knowing who it was. (Although it seemed kind of obvious: A) that was Gokudera's special ring-tone on Tsuna's phone that no one else had, B) the light from the screen glowed red, which was the color shirt Gokudera was wearing when Tsuna took the picture for his contact, and C) who the hell else would call him at midnight?)

"…Hello…?" he moaned breathily into the speaker.

"HAPPY BIRTHDAY, TENTH!" :D :D :D :D :D

…

…

…

Tsuna sighed. "Thanks." And he hung up and tried to go back to sleep.

0o.o0o.o0

**Short fic is short…**

**Oh BTW, you know what I thought was cool today? I was doing a thing in chemistry class where the answer to question #18 was D. How happy was I? (Very.)**


	5. Oct 26 Chikusa

**A few of things:**

**A: I'm sorry this is late. I've been just completely swamped these days. I took a trip out of town to go to a convention/workshop/competition for newspaper (yes, I am on my high school's newspaper staff, and it's a very rewarding and tiresome job), and then when I got back Tuesday I had to spend that day and Wednesday at school until 9:30 at night, plus I had a lot of makeup work from Monday and regular homework to do, plus two – no, **_**three**_** – projects. Yeah. I have an excuse.**

**B: I put my OC in here. Because I can! Oh, yeah, and they also live in Namimori right now.**

**C: The next chapter should be… my OC's on November sixth. I'm counting my OC because I feel like it. ;P**

**D: I don't own KHR. So suck it!**

0o.o0o.o0

The Kokuyo Gang had a tradition: whenever it was a member's birthday, he or she would wake up to find presents from everyone else on his or her nightstand. Today happened to be October 26th, Chikusa Kakimoto's birthday.

Mukuro got him a new hat. Coolio. Chrome got him a chain because he seemed to have been losing his glasses a lot lately. Thoughtful. Luana got him that new Three Days Grace CD that came out yesterday and he said he wanted. Awesome. M.M cheaped out a little, got him a $10 WalMart gift card. Alright. Ken got him… the water bill.

And as a courtesy to all their efforts, it was also tradition that the birthday boy or girl used every single one of his or her gifts on the day of his or her birthday. Unfortunately for Chikusa.

But Ken's evil plan to get Chikusa to pay the massive Kokuyo house water bill out of pocket would not go unavenged, oh no. The Kappa had a plot to get back at that beast.

0o.o0o.o0

"We ready to go?" Mukuro asked with his usual smile.

The six of them were gearing up for Chikusa's birthday dinner at TakeSushi. They were all a bit overdressed, but hey, it was celebratory. But they had agreed to split the check, except for Mukuro paying for Chikusa's food, and of course (because you all know that everything ever is Ken's fault in the world of the Kokuyo gang XD), the one scrambling around at the last minute for food money was everyone's favorite blonde, fake-teeth-cartridge user.

Luana (**A/N: **Luana is my OC. She's Ken's cousin-by-marriage ((meaning her aunt is married to Ken's uncle)). She's actually quite different from the Luana in _Whirlwing_, as you may notice) rolled her eyes. "Calm yourself, Kenny."

Ken lurched at his cousin-by-marriage's feet. "But! I! Can't!" He shook her shoulders. "I has no moneys!"

She smacked him off of her. "Well, I'm not paying for you," she said. "Not with what I know you always order."

He was on the floor pleading now. "Anyone know where it is?"

Mukuro sighed, "I guess not."

Just then, the dapper birthday boy walked into the kitchen where everyone had gathered. "Where what is?" he asked casually.

Ken latched onto the black-haired boy's ankle. "My sock drawer money!" he yelled. "I can't find it anywhere, and we're about to go eat!"

"You mean that wad of bills in your sock drawer?" Chikusa said.

"Yeah!" the blonde whimpered.

Chikusa Kakimoto rolled his empty blue eyes toward the ceiling for a second, as if he didn't know, and kicked the sniveling Ken Joshima away.

"Oh, that," he finally said. "I just took it and put it in my yo-yo fund."

Mukuro Rokudo, Luana Diluca, M.M and even Chrome Dokuro burst out laughing while Ken repeatedly punched a sturdy, _smiling_ birthday boy in the leg.

Victory.


	6. Nov 6 Luana OC

**...I don't really have much to say. **

**I'm sorry this is late. I don't even really know what took me so long. Oh, and the ending is rushed, which I kinda hate, but whatever.**

**The next birthday is Leviathan on the 14th. Hopefully I'll actually have it out by then.**

**I don't own KHR. But I do own Luana. (:**

0o.o0o.o0

Okay, Luana Diluca admitted that she didn't have an ordinary life. She was second-in-charge of the Kokuyo Gang, living with five other teenage Kokuyo Gang members just as crazy as she was (being Mukuro, Chrome, M.M, Ken and Chikusa); she was also an independent member of the Vongola. She was a headhunter/manager for several drug cartels, prostitution rings and weaponry dealerships, although she never worked directly in any of those, herself. She was also an illusionist – one of Mukuro Rokudo's best disciples. She had a younger adoptive brother who lived a nearly equally crazy life with the Varia. Luana had the murder of her parents (by her) under her belt. She was also battling Schizophrenia. Oh, yeah, and her boyfriend was the Tenth Vongola Storm Guardian.

All of Luana's friends and loved ones wondered how she managed to grim and bear it every single day. Therefore, they figured it was only a matter of time before she snapped.

0o.o0o.o0

"Happy birthday, Kitten," Mukuro grinned as he hugged Luana when she came out of her bedroom the morning of her sixteenth birthday. (**A/N: **three cheers for run-on sentences!) His nickname for her had stuck ever since they met, and although she thought it was sweet it could get quite awkward at times.

She smiled back at him. "Thanks." The necklace Ken gave her hung from her neck and its rubies gleamed in the light. (Yes, Ken got her a necklace. He decided not to give any more stupid gifts to anyone after Chikusa took all his money. You don't want to know how Ken Joshima got his sock drawer money back from Chikusa Kakimoto to pay for that stupid necklace.) She also had on the scarf that M.M got her, a jacket from Chikusa, the cutest pair of heels from Chrome and Mukuro's earrings. And of course her own shirt and skirt. What could she say? She loved to dress to impress, and her friends knew this. Though there were a few things about her look that she never changed up. 90% of the time she wore a dress or skirt; 95% of the time she kept her hair down and curly and full and beautiful; and 100% of the time she wore the same bright red lipstick.

Luana's chocolate brown eyes then wandered around the hall. "Where are the others?"

"LUANAAAAAAAA!" Ken leapt onto her back from behind. She didn't mean to, but on instinct she picked him up and flipped him over and off of her.

She stepped back and put her hands to her mouth. "I am so sorry…"

Ken struggled to stand up. "It's okay," he grunted. "Just glad to see you're prepared for an attack."

The other four residents of the house came up to the birthday girl and one by one gave her hugs. Luana Diluca typically did not like people touching her, but the five of them were some of the few exceptions, the others being her brother and her lover.

Then she stepped away from all the excitement, towards the bathroom. "Just let me fix myself up all the way and we can go get breakfast someplace," she said.

_Clink, clink_, up to the vanity. She wasted no time fluffing up her hair, putting on her makeup, making extra-carefully-sure of her trademark red lipstick. Wait a second…

She rummaged through all the drawers, shuffling everything out of the way, layers and layers of everyone else's crap. Some drawers were even pulled off their tracks in her frantic search. "Guys!" she yelled. "Where is my lipstick?"

M.M tentatively walked into the bathroom. "It's not in its usual spot?" she asked.

Luana looked menacingly up at the redhead. "Would I be asking if it was?" she said sarcastically.

The phone rang.

The brunette rolled her eyes and stood. "Never mind," she sighed, "I'll find it later. I have to answer that." She was usually the one to answer phones at the house, since the majority of the calls were for her.

She wrapped her fingers around the phone and held it delicately up to her ear, trying not to taint her nails, perfectly long and painted black. "Hello?" Immediately she was met with panting and grunting and sounds of a struggle on the other end. She took the speaker back from her ear slightly and made a disturbed face.

"Lulu…" Her brother's monotone voice came through. Or at least, she deduced it was her brother, seeing as he was the only person she could ever tolerate being called 'Lulu' by. (**A/N: **In case you haven't figured it out yet, Luana's adoptive brother is Fran. :D If you did figure it out before this, here, I offer you this invisible candy bar. Eat it responsibly.)

She brought the phone closer and raised an eyebrow. "Frannie? What's going on?"

"…Happy birthday…" "Give me the phone, you Stupid Frog! The Prince needs to make a very important call!" "…Love you…" "Hand it over, dammit!" "…I have to go now before Bel-sempai kills me…" "Are you de—" _Beeeeeeeeeep~_

After taking a moment to thaw out her shocked expression, Luana put the phone back on the receiver and walked away. "Weird…" she mumbled.

She bumped into M.M in the bathroom doorway. "I found it," she said triumphantly and held the short gold stick in front of her roommate's face.

Luana swiped it away from her. "Thank you," she said. M.M quickly scrammed out of the room while Luana sat at the vanity and popped the lid off of the lipstick. She twisted the end so the pointy red part slid up, and she lifted it carefully toward her lips. The tip touched them. Then, all the sudden, everything went dark.

She looked back and forth to make sure she wasn't just hallucinating this – but the groans from the other five residents of this crazy house made her suspicions quite clear: the lights were out.

The brunette burst out of the bathroom and pointed an accusing finger at Chrome. "You!" she shouted. "Did you send the electric bill this month?"

Chrome nodded timidly.

The phone rang again. Luana answered it, this time with a little more vigor in her normally dainty steps as she walked toward it. "Hm?"

It was a robot voice. "Hi, this is Namimori Energy Company. Today you may be experiencing rolling blackouts as we are making repairs to some major power lines today. Please do not be alarmed. If you have any further questions, please call—" _Slam_. Luana hung up and stomped back into the bathroom. "Losers," she swore under her breath.

She opened the blinds to the window at the back of the room to let the morning light in. It was dim, and striped, but it was better than nothing. She stayed very close up to the mirror to apply to lipstick without making any mistakes.

She walked out two minutes later completely done and glared straight at her best friends. When they noticed her deadly stare, she gave them a big cheesy grin.

"Well," Luana said through her teeth, "At least we're alive, right?"

The five of them made strange faces.

"Luana," Chikusa said, "Why is your head turning so awkwardly like that?" (**A/N: **Like a curious dog. Or a demon. Or Stewie from that one episode of Family Guy when he killed Lois.)

"Oh, this?" Luana squeaked. She turned it back to its normal upright position. "That's nothing."

_Ring ring_ went the phone.

Luana screamed. "Why must the phone ring every five f*cking minutes in this house?"

She stormed up to the phone, her housemates watching her every move in horror. "What?"

"Uh, happy birthday, Luana…"

Luana gasped and the satanic look on her face disappeared instantly when she recognized whose voice it was. "Oh, God, Hayato, I'm so sorry. I didn't know that was you…"

He chuckled once. "It's okay."

She smiled.

"But listen, about our date tonight…" he began to trail off.

She took in another deep breath and put on her demon face again. "Yeah…" she said roughly.

"I don't think I'll be able to make it."

"…Why…?" She could literally feel her blood pressure rising.

"Well," Hayato Gokudera the Tenth Vongola Storm Guardian said, "Let's just say I'm a little tied up here…" –cough— "literally." –cough— "Aha, but I promise I'll make it up to you later, okay?"

Luana Diluca developed a confused expression. "Um, okay."

Suddenly her boyfriend of three months' voice was hurried and hushed. "Gotta go. Bye!" Just before Hayato hung up, she heard another man's angry voice in the background. She couldn't tell what he was saying – it sounded like another language – but it still made her change her mind about yelling at him later.

After a minute, Ken walked up to Luana, put his hand over hers and 'helped' her put the phone back on the hook. He waved his clawed hand in front of her frozen face. When that proved futile, he looked down at the screen of the caller ID. "Uh, yeah, that was a Russian phone number he just called from…" he said. "I think he's gonna be a while."

Luana raised a single fine brown eyebrow. "Oh, really?" And her breathing got heavier.

_The following scene has been censored because it was so violent, even the devil himself became deeply disturbed by it. It is too gruesome for your mortal eyes. Don't even try to picture it. Seriously. You will explode if you even attempt to do that. _


	7. Nov 14 Levi

**I was bored. And watching Invader ZIM. And it's Levi-A-Than's birthday. So, here.**

**I don't own KHR or Invader ZIM – sort of this chapter plot. So don't sue. Please. That would be bad.**

**The next birthday is I-Pin's, I think, but I'll have to double-check. **

0o.o0o.o0

When the image of his beloved boss popped on the screen, he beamed excitedly.

"…Boss! Boss! Hey! Hey Boss! Boss? Boss! Hey! Hey! Hey! Booooooossssssssssss! Boss? Boss! Hey! Hey Boss! Boss? It's me! Boss? Boss! …"

Xanxus held up his one hand and slapped the other onto his face. Levi shut up.

"I was waiting to see when you would shut up on your own, but it's been three hours, Levi. THREE…hours," he groaned. "What do you want?"

Squalo, who was standing next to Xanxus, was also on the screen, and he had a rather disgusted expression on his face.

"Well, I noticed you're moving closer to the Japan than _ever_ before!" Levi-A-Than had been staying in Japan on a spy mission for the past seven weeks, and he had grown lonely. Even the little tenth brat and his friends weren't in the same stupid town.

Xanxus' face became twisted. "How would you know that?"

Levi smiled even wider. "Oh, I know all kinds of things about _you_… Pretty creepy, huh?" he chuckled slightly to himself. "Anyhow, I was—"

Squalo raised an accusing finger. "Hey!" he interrupted. "That _is_ creepy! You're creepy, Levi."

0o.o0o.o0

Levi gripped the controls carefully as the airship shakily rose over the Earth. He steadied it after a moment of riding through the empty, beautiful space.

He decided to give his partner a quick briefing, for clarification.

"Okay, Lambo!" he shouted to the dashboard. The little cow kid next to him looked in his direction.

"Our mission begins now," Levi continued. "Let us rain some _doom_ down upon the filthy heads of our _doomed_ enemies." He developed a scrunched-up, intent look.

Lambo stared at the man for a very long time, his giant, vibrant green eyes unblinking and starting to glaze over. Finally, he chirped up, "I'm gonna sing the doom song now!" He grinned widely, looked out the window and sang loudly, "Doom doom doom doom doom doom doom doom doom, doom doom doom, doom doom doom doo-doo-doo-doom, doom doom doom~"

_Six months later_

"…doom! Doom! Doo-doo-doo-doom, de-doom~"

Levi sat staring up at the ceiling, his eyes glassy, his body limp, drool lolling from his lip. "Lambo…" he said shakily.

Lambo kept singing. "Doom, doom doom~"

Levi squeaked out in a weak and broken voice, "Would you _please_ stop singing?"

Nope.

0o.o0o.o0

As the teacher droned on about the same old thing over and over again, Basil set a twitching, scrutinizing eye on the tattooed, heavily pierced man at the other end of the room.

"Okay," he said, almost to himself, as he stared, "Am I the only one here who sees the Varia dude sitting in class?"

The other students heard, and began looking at each other. But only for a moment.

Basil furrowed his eyebrows and pointed at Levi. "There."

Nobody looked.

"Right there!"

All the students' eyes were suddenly set on Levi. He began to sweat.

"That is no kid!" he shouted, standing from his desk. "It's a Varia. A Varia! One of the hitmen I've been talking about! He's here to conquer the Vongola—"

Levi tried inconspicuously to reach for the self-destruct button on his shirt sleeve.

The girl behind Levi gripped the chair in front of her and rolled her eyes. "Aw, not this again," she said. "You're crazy." She slunk back into her chair. Levi lowered his quivering hand away from the self-destruct button.

Basil was so excited, he was standing on top of his desk. He fisted his hands. "What about his horrible lightning bolt tattoo?" he asked.

Levi shot up at this. "Insolent schoolboy!" But he caught himself, sat back down and folded his hands. "It's a skin condition." He glanced about nervously.

Basil leaned over into another student's face. "And he's got those crazy piercings!" He stood back straight up again. "Is that part of your '_skin_ condition', Levi? Piercings?"

Levi glared evilly at Basil for one second before shrinking down to a shy hunch. "…yes."

0o.o0o.o0

**Okay, so that was completely and totally irrelevant to the subject of "birthday", but whatever! I was just inspired to write this. I guess.**

**Oh, and also, check out this YouTube video… of win. (Copy & paste it into the thing and get rid of the spaces and you will be taken there to watch the video and it will be awesome.) **http: / /www. you tube .com/ watch? v=3N c-XI 5aNg I **(I didn't make it and I don't own it.) B-bye!**


	8. Nov 25 IPin

**Now for I-Pin's Birthday. I'm sorry this is ONE DAY late - I wrote it on the 25th, so that has to count for something, right?**

**Anyhoo, sorry for the rushed idea. It's kinda stupid, but hey, at least it's relevant to the birthday theme this time. (Oh, and there's no Luana in this chapter.)**

**I have no idea who comes next! I don't own KHR. Have a nice day. (:**

**Key**:  
Words = present  
_Words _= flashback

The white gleam of the computer screen bounced off her glasses as she clicked and typed around on the dating site. When her roommate came in, I-Pin didn't even skew her attention away from the machine.

Chrome set her purse on the kitchen counter. "You haven't moved at all since I left…" she remarked.

At that point, Chrome was one of the only single Vongola Guardians, more or less – though she made an effort to visit her dear Mukuro in prison every day. Since she technically lived alone, I-Pin was more than welcome to stay with her, which she did. Hibari and Yamamoto lived alone, too, but Chrome was the least awkward for I-Pin to stay with. Otherwise, Hana and Ryohei were engaged, and so were Hayato and Haru, and Tsuna and Kyoko lived together. Lambo jumped around between living with Tsuna and Yamamoto, mostly as Hana and Ryohei's house was too small, and Haru was nice to him but he and Hayato always butted heads, and Hibari just plain didn't like sharing things.

I-Pin leaned away to let Chrome read her screen. "That 'Starlit Silhouette*' person seems nice," the Mist Guardian said.

The Chinese girl nodded. "Oh, yes! I've never had this much of a connection with a guy before, Chrome!"

Chrome kicked off her shoes, hung her jacket on the coatrack and retreated to the couch. "Do you know him?" she asked.

I-Pin shook her head. "But I will," she said, wheeling around in the office chair to face her roommate. "Tonight, we go on a blind date."

"On your birthday?" Chrome asked with a smile. _How romantic._

"Yes!" I-Pin shrieked, clapping. She turned sideways, exited out of the Internet window of the computer and walked over to her room. "Now," she said to herself, "If I can find those cute little yellow heels…"

(***A/N**: Starlit Silhouette is the username of the guy I-Pin was talking to.)

0o.o0o.o0

His electric green eyes were fresh and smiling. His long black hair was combed and in an order. His skin seemed to glow in the ambient light of the restaurant. He was dressed up, cleaned up –

He looked better than he had in months.

All the while, I-Pin couldn't speak. She couldn't believe it was really him, the boy she had been rejecting all along…

"_The truth is, I-Pin," he said, taking her lithe hands in his, "I love you."_

"I really love you," he said.

"_I'm sorry, but I don't feel that way about you," she winced, and he let go._

"You didn't honestly think I'd give up that easily?" Lambo tapped the bow in his hair. He smiled at his blind date.

I-Pin gave him a choking smile. "Lambo – you're a great present."

0o.o0o.o0

**BTW, have any of you out there read Alice in the Country of Hearts (other than Emi-chan)? I just finished the first book, and let me just say, I really love Nightmare. :D (He kinda looks like Gokudera, except he has dark hair and an eyepatch.) It's so funny how Nightmare's all menacing and mysterious and stuff toward Alice and then all the sudden just vomits up blood and acts adorably pathetic - he's a demon! Demons shouldn't be afraid of hospitals! **


	9. Dec 5 Chrome

**Yoohoo! Carlile's here! I'm finally updating :D Here's a thing for Chrome, to celebrate her birthday. I actually decided to skip Shoichi because I don't particularly like him... Oh and sorry for the horribly rushed ending. I didn't have the time or patience to make this any longer. Let's just leave it an open-ended mystery, shall we? **

**I don't own KHR. *sniffle***

**Oh and YAY 6996! God I make them so OOC. **

_Chrome… Chrome, darling, can you hear me…? …Chrome…_

His voice emerges from the deepest abyss of my mind, further up in my consciousness, beckoning me, echoing. It tingles.

_Open your eyes, dear._

A sharp breath rolls down my throat. My left eye flutters open.

Half of my face is buried in the thick pillow. I'm facing the wall, with my hand under my head, and it's dark. My bare arm slips out behind me from under the sheets to the eyepatch on my nightstand. It's not there.

I can feel fingertips land gently on the nape of my neck. I shudder; then they slide up to my right eye, circumvent my head and float away. My eyepatch now all on, I shoot up, gasping, and turn.

He's standing there, bathed in the dark air. An enthusiastic smile graces his handsome face, and there is a radiance about his eyes that I have never seen before. He wears a full and sharply tailored black suit, now keeping his hands behind his back. His bluish hair is combed through. He seems… so happy.

My good eye bursts open more. "M-Mukuro…" I say, "What are you doing here?"

He chuckles softly. Then he tilts his head slightly, gesturing towards the alarm clock beside my bed. I glance at it. It says 11:57.

And then Mukuro tells me, "Chrome, from midnight tonight until midnight tomorrow, it is your birthday. I fully intend to make this your very best birthday ever."

My eyes find him again, a bewildered smirk on my face. "H-huh?" I breathe.

He quickly peers at the clock. "11:58." He holds a large, graceful hand out to me, still grinning humbly. "Take my hand," he says.

I set my hand on his tremulously, swing my legs over the edge of the bed and, with his help, stand. He doesn't let go of me, but instead lifts both our hands above my head and twirls me around once. All around my body, I can see a golden glow emanate from my skin and feel something take form. I look down during the stillness and find myself wearing the most beautiful dress I've ever seen.

It's made of golden thread, glittering, with the texture of fine silk, dripping with rubies and pearls, and with a sheer outer skirt over the bottom and a white ruffled corset underneath the top. I am lifted two inches off of the ground by a pair of dark red heels. My hair falls out of the tight, fluffy bun I usually keep it in and into flowing curls that brush my shoulders. In one blink, my face is covered in makeup. My ears suddenly feel heavy with hanging gold earrings and a gold necklace winds around my neck.

Mukuro, still smiling, says, "11:59."

My free hand flies to my chest as I examine myself. "Mukuro… this is beautiful…"

He lets go of me, then wraps his arms around my waist from behind and smoothes out the skirt a little. "Chrome, my darling, you could be dressed in the lowliest rags and be absolutely gorgeous, and I would still look to be only your humble, disgusting servant, even while wearing this. Though, while planning this, I honestly doubted that you would want to wear a burlap sack around all the places we were going, so I came up with this." He then adds, "I'm very happy you like it."

"I love it," I say waveringly. But then I pivot to the side and he loosens his grip slightly. "Wait, we're going places?"

He lays his head on my shoulder and nods. His eyes wander to the alarm clock. "12:00." The faint chime of the grandfather clock in the hall across the house goes off. My bedroom is suddenly filled with light radiating out from the two of us, reaching to the furthest, darkest corners. The floor shifts, my bed shakes, my armoire pops open and the thin curtains over my window flap about violently. A fierce wind hits me and tosses my skirt and hair wildly. I close my eye, rapidly turn around and bury my face in Mukuro's chest, gripping him tightly.

In a second, the wind is gone. The air is fresh and cold. There is the nearly unnoticeable patter of something tiny on my head and shoulders.

"You may open your eyes now," he says soothingly. I straighten up, lift my head, gaze upon the scene surrounding us… we're not in my room anymore.


	10. Dec 22 Bel

**Yay! An update! Short and sweet (;**

**I don't own KHR. …Isn't Fuuta next? I think so. **

0o.o0o.o0

Levi tripped over his own feet, practically falling through the door as he panted heavily. He was barely in the back room when he slammed the door shut with his entire body, frantically locking the door with his arm and sliding exhaustedly down to the floor.

Sporting a very manly pink silken bathrobe and fuzzy slippers, Lussuria glared at the tattooed man, tapping his foot impatiently. Xanxus had somehow found a chair in the otherwise empty back room and of course his lazy – erm, I mean, _regal _– ass was right in there and not moving for a tornado. Fran and Mammon were sitting across from each other on the floor playing a heated game of illusionary rock-paper-scissors, and Squalo was in the corner, in the fetal position, rocking back and forth with a look on his face like he just saw hell and was mumbling, "No more, no more," over and over again to himself.

A bead of sweat rolled down Levi's flushed face. "It's insane out there," he breathed.

"No kidding," Lussuria said roughly. Silence worked its way into the tiny room, leaving the loud booms and roars and crashes of destruction outside to fill the void of sound.

Xanxus sighed angrily. When his red eyes opened, everyone in the room looked at him, and surely they listened when he said in an ominously calm voice:

"Whose bright f*cking idea was it to give Belphegor a chainsaw for his birthday?"


End file.
